Bread…

I literally love bread! I do not think it makes you fat. And here’s why! It has to do with moderation. And good ingredients! I am a firm believer in having what you want but learning what your body needs. Bread done right is not horrible for you or your waistline, especially in small amounts. Especially if you aren’t really allergic to the ingredients. Anything that you have too much of is a problem. Having said all of that, I do understand that not all bread is made the same. Have you ever looked at what is in your loaf of bread? Have you seen the comparisons of what used to be in a loaf of bread versus what is now in a loaf of bread? The simple truth in healthy eating is that anything that has to be made in one place and shipped or stored in another for an undetermined amount of time will require chemicals and things that make it shelf stable and last longer. My grandmother made bread everyday. We used to shop at the “bread store” when I was younger. Merita had a store on Old Pineville Rd. Now we shop at a grocery store and our bread comes from who-knows-where. Even some of the baker’s breads, like LaBrae, will have stabilizers and additives to make them last longer, but those are better for your gut and the environment, and yet so much more expensive. So my solution has been this journey of making my own bread.

My favorite sourdough loaf so far!

I started with a really terrible relationship with yeast. I tried for years to made bread in a bread maker, then just dough of any type, like pizza dough, with yeast. Nothing really turned out well in my house. Until I moved into my new house! The only thing I can figure is that the old house was drafty and often cold. Seriously! Dough would not rise in my old house! Now I have no problems making yeast breads, pizza dough, you name it. I’ve really had some yummy successes in the last 3 years since we moved.

My relationship with bread comes from my Dad! He could make the best bread and cornbread, and did so at least once a week.

Then my friend at church brought me some of her sourdough starter. I was so intimidated! But she walked me through step by step what to do. I don’t need the science behind it, just the directions. I have had my ups and downs. One time I thought I put too much water and the dough looked really runny, but once it baked, it was perfect with big airholes and chewyness except it molded stored on the counter for 4 or 5 days. Another time I didn’t put the oven temp high enough and the inside of the bread didn’t cook. But there have been way more successes than failures! Here are some things that I have learned…

  • There are a million recipes and directions out there I’ve always been told that baking is exact and that is really why I shy away from it. But it is not! Choose one method and stick with it long enough to feel comfortable experimenting away from it.
My first experiment…tiny loaves for Christmas presents for my friends!
  • Don’t invest in a bunch of things until you know you want to continue doing it. You can proof your loaf in the pan or bowl. You can use bread pans, clay bakers, whatever to bake them in. The starte can be stirred with a knife and covered with a towel. Don’t overcomplicated it!
  • Plan your schedule. The one down side I’ve found is that it is time consuming and requires a plan…the starter has to sit for 12 hours, the dough sits for 12 hours, the dough proofs for an hour before baking. I personally take my starter out to warm it up on Friday AM, Feed it Friday PM, Make the dough Sat AM, proof and bake Sat PM. Different recepies will have different steps and times, but it will take you 2 days or so to make bread. Where as yeast bread can take just 6-8 hours.
  • Be part of the community. Where ever you get your starter or favorite recipe or favorite process from will create a community. Follow people on social with different ideas. Take tips from any one who will offer them. The friend I started with and I talk about sourdough every time we see each other! She will try something new and share it with me. I send her pics of all the things I try. It really is all about being part of that community!
My First Loaf!

I think the biggest lesson is just to try! Don’t be scared! Cooking good food has always been an accomplishment for me. Making that first beautiful, perfect loaf gave me such a sense of self sufficiency. I don’t have to depend on buying bread from a bakery or store. I don’t have to have fancy equipment or tons of time on my hands. I can make something really good and healthy for me and my family right here in my own home with my own two hands. Absolutely worth it!

Downsizing

Graduation season is here and parents of those graduates are starting to think about what happens next! It’s a crazy time of life because you are likely caring for almost adult children and aging parents at the same time. There is no time like the present to DOWNSIZE. It may be just the child’s bedroom or it may be your parents whole house, but the process can be difficult and stressful. The last thing you want is to have to do it in a hurry, making decisions you’ll regret later. I suggest starting way before you actually have to. Here are 5 tips that can help!

Clarify your Goals – What do you want to accomplish in the next 10 years? As the kids are off to live their life, it could be opening doors for your life that you hadn’t thought about. If you are retiring, there could be something that you always wanted to accomplish that you finally have time to work toward. Start with your WHY! Not sure what I mean by that or have never dug in to you Why? Read the book Start with Why by Simon Sinek! I went through the process about 7 years ago and realized that my Why is to HELP people. Every decision I make in my business is filtered through that why, so if there is a decision to be made I ask “will it help people?”. Maybe your Why is to see the world! That would require a lot of time and planning and probably a lot less stuff in your home!

Declutter – Go room by room and take inventory. Make a bin for Donate, Sell or Toss. Remember all the fuss years ago about the Marie Kondo method… “If it doesn’t bring you joy!” If you didn’t do that when it was trending, this is a great time to do it. And if you did, I bet you need to do it again! It is amazing the amount of stuff we accumulate in a year. Don’t be afraid to do it once or twice a year. This is the most time consuming part, so start early. You may need to hire a professional. I have a few companies that will come do this for you, determining if there are valuable things for an estate sale or what can just get trashed. My favorite right now is BlueStar Move Management. I have had tons of people ask me for a company like this and I finally found one!

Evaluate Financial Position – Finances will definitely change at this stage of life, so take some time to speak to your financial person or review your budget. Remember that equity in your home can be turned into cash if there are college bills to pay or properties to buy, especially now with all the changes to college loans. In past experiences I have used a couple of strategies that may work for you. If you are looking to move a parent and downsize their home, consider using the equity in their current home to purchase or put a downpayment on the new one. Once the original home sells everything will be paid off at closing. If you are looking for a space to move you college kid, considering using the equity in your own home to buy or put a down payment on that property. If you choose to purchase that property outright, it will be an investment property and require a 20% downpayment, but if you have leases signed or commitments from tenants to pay rent, it will likely not count on your own Debt To Income (DTI) ratio. There are also loan products available called bridge loans, where the lender will help if you have to buy then sell a property.

Evaluate Housing Options – If you have a kid on their way to college or the real world, you could potentially turn their need for housing into your first investment property! Don’t allow them to pay rent to someone else when they, and their friends, could pay rent to you. I even like the idea of letting that child “buy” the home from you once they have finished school and have a job. Whether they choose to live in it, sell it, or rent it out, they can start their adult life with the one thing that truly creates financial mobility, home ownership. There are many options as we retire for downsized housing that can easily fit into those goals you clarified earlier. We recently moved my mother into a condo at the lake. It is a big switch from her house of 50 years in the middle of Charlotte on almost an acre of land, but she has grown to really love it. It took us about 3 months to get her completely moved in and downsized. We purchased the condo first so she could take her time with a loan that I “co-signed” for. Once we sold her house in Charlotte we simply paid off the loan and the HELOC money we had borrowed to help make that transition.

Condominiums can be a great choice for Graduates or Retires because of the small space, smaller price point, and amenities the community offers. The can also turn into great rental properties for short-term or long-term rentals, but make sure to read the association documents carefully.

Execute – Make a schedule to achieve those goals. Find help and assistance where needed. You may need to hire movers, contractors, a real estate agent, or a home management company. There are lots of options! I talk to familys all the time that are trying to sell properties once the family member is deceased. They are left with an entire home full of belongings that they do not know what to do with. These Move Management companies can come in and sort through to see if an estate sale would be worth it, or what items should just get junked or donated. I recently spoke to a woman who was doing her best to go through and get rid of as many things as possible before that happened to her children. It may be as simple as a detailed outline in a will that gives every member of the family the responsibility of the items. Something that specific would need to be revised in a timely manner.

At the end of the day we can’t all be like my Aunt Peggy who sold all of her worldly possessions except for 1 chair, a plate, and a fork to travel the world in her RV, but I do think we could eliminate the clutter around us in order to eliminate some of the clutter in our lives. Starting with a blank slate in the big changes of our life can be scary so seek some help. Whether you are cleaning out a graduates bedroom to fill their dorm or making a spare bed room, or downsizing a whole home into a condo in retirement, it will take Goals, Help, and a Plan!

My WHY…

Every year we reflect on the previous year and plan for the next. I coach agents at my firm to start that in October! I heard a great discussion recently about not setting resolutions but setting intentions, for the year, for the month, and even at the beginning of every week. I liked that idea so I am going to try that this year and see how it resonates with my personal and professional goals. But in all the research and learning (and teaching) that I have done about growth and business planning, there is one lesson that is worth the time, the read, the review, and/or the patience. The very first exercise you should do this January, whether for your professional self or your personal self, is figuring out your WHY.

It all started with me a few years ago when I was introduced to the book Start With Why by Simon Sinek. I had been in real estate for a couple of years and was doing okay, but really wanted to take my business to the next level. I had absolutely NO idea of how to do that! I was not brought up in an entrepreneurial lifestyle where you were granted freedom to dream or try or do. I was raised that you went to school, went to college, got a job, and eventually you got to retire so you could do fun stuff. (Bullshit! I wanted to do fun stuff right now! Why do fun stuff when you’re too old to enjoy it!) And real estate was beginning to show me that was a possibility. I just didn’t know where to go next. What I found from reading this book was not a magic formula for making money (pst…there are none of those), or all of the answers to “How to Build a Real Estate Empire in 30 days” (also not real). What I found was a deeply personal journey that forced me to get honest about who I was, what made me happy, and what I wanted to do.

Probably my favorite exercise that I coach agents to do when they start business planning and beginning to think about their Why or read the book, is an exercise called 7 Layers Deep. I heard it in a workshop with Dean Graziosi, Who is another author to put on your nonfiction playlist. Here’s how it works…

Ask yourself WHY you do whatever thing it is you do. “Why Real Estate?”

Answer that questions honestly. “Because I need to make money.”

Then ask yourself WHY to that answer “WHY?”

Answer that question honestly. “Because I have to pay bills.”

Continue that process for 7 LAYERS (the above being layers 1 and 2). By the time you get to the end you will have an answer that guides you in everything you do and every decision you make. For me it boiled down to my need to help people (and animals). So when I am making a decision about business or life or finances or anything really, I always start there… am I helping people?

When the Broker in Charge of my firm asked me to be Operations Director 2 years ago, I asked myself that question. The answer was yes. I would be helping other agents with their business. So it was easy for me to say yes to that opportunity.

I think your WHY can change over time. I think it is very important to revisit that exercise every now and then. I very much still want to help other people, but I am starting to want to help myself a little bit more. Maybe it’s my age. Or maybe it’s some Freudian reason because no one helps me. You know, that hierarchy of needs that have to be taken care of before you can take care of others. Wait, that’s Maslow. Anyway…

I am SUPER excited about 2025! Maybe because it is a great number (25 being 1/4 of the century). Or maybe it’s because I know what I want and I’m getting closer to figuring out how to get it! Either way, I hope that you can create a plan to get exactly what you want out of life, even if it takes another quarter of a century to do it. And if you need help creating that plan or want to bounce idea off of someone, you should reach out to me. Because, remember, I am here to HELP! Happy New Year!

Building Things

I absolutely love building things! What I have learned about myself in my last decade on Earth is that I truly enjoy figuring out how to do something myself. It brings me so much joy when I have an idea or plan and it works out! But what I’ve noticed the most is that my plan never works out exactly the way I plan it. There is always some variation that, inevitably, works out better. I have enjoyed learning the faith involved in that element of building. I have built a farm, a business, a family and a home. I have many plans to build many more things in my next decade. Building things takes a little knowledge, a bit of strategy, and a lot of faith.

My best example of building things, in real estate at least, is my current house. If you are not familiar, we built a new construction home on our existing farm. I had so many plans and ideas that didn’t work out! The biggest change that had to be made was in the location of the house. I wanted it placed in the woods on the other side of the creek. We built (and paid for) a culvert, an extra long drive way, and tons of gravel that gets absolutely no use today. But in the end, the house is perfect. We have a brand new home in a great location that gave us a ton of instant equity. I brought the knowledge of how to build the house using a contractor mainly from researching and working through a million different scenarios. We strategized the entire time, learning about land development, financing rules, and building issues. But the real magic came in the faith that it would turn out for the best. And it sure did!

A more recent example of building in real estate is the new construction project that my clients recently went under contract on. It is a gorgeous new house outside of Asheville. An independent builder bought this lot in a new neighborhood and designed and began construction on the home. We went under contract when it was at about 70% complete. This is a unique dynamic where the builder agent is NOT controlling the process of the build for my clients, the way a community home builder or track home builder would. In this case, a buyer agent, such as myself, has proved to be more important than ever! I am trying to help my clients understand what they can and cannot do, since the construction is nearly complete. We recently had an issue with granite. The buyers were able to pick granite, but they didn’t like the selections the builder gave them. As always, my philosophy of real estate is that there is always a solution, so that skill has proved invaluable in new construction!

Probably my most valuable thing that I built is this homestead! It may never be complete, either. But it is truly exactly what I wanted. My goal out here on the farm is to be a self sustaining as possible. I am no doomsday planner, but I grew up in a family that grew our own food and relied on family and friends to get things done. We have been able to create that out here, on a small scale, and I have tons of plans to continue that building…like solar panels on the barn, a deck and detached garage, and increasing the garden.

Building things is my biggest goal in life! I want to build more houses. But I also want to build family and business. I want to help other people build businesses. I want to build more houses for other people. I truly enjoy watching the process, even if I end up cussing the majority of the way through, like we did on our home! That’s the proof that I’m meant to build things. I have a small amount of knowledge and plan to really increase that, maybe even getting my own contractor license. I am great at creating a strategy in all the areas of building! And my faith in the process gets stronger and stronger every time I am proved wrong! I look forward to a long line of more things to build!

The Season of Giving Up

Have you had a rough time? I don’t know if it’s just me. I don’t feel like it is. I’ve talked to a lot of people that are having an equally rough time. What I find is that every one has their own rough season, but we all have them. For some of us it lasts months, for some it lasts years, but all of us go through a period of time where the successes may be small or few and the defeats are giant or plentiful (we’ll get to the difference in a bit). Part of me would like to think this is like a COVID hang over. We tried to fix a national emergency by throwing money at it and now we are paying the price for that economically and socially. I think that even if the problems are not really economical in your life it has a trickle effect into the rest of our psyche that causes this time of utter frustration and disappointment. So I have chosen this as a time to regroup. And what better time than my favorite time of the year, Business Planning Season. This year I want to talk about a season of giving up!

Let’s talk about the idea of giving up first. If you are not someone who has ever done this, maybe it will feel difficult at first, but I can guarantee it will be liberating. This is the act of simply walking away, changing direction, putting it out of your mind, setting it down, moving on, finding a different thing. Whatever it is you choose to give up on, there are no hard feelings, no regrets, and no disappointment. It is a conscious decisions based on some serious, deep inner-work. You make an educated decision to do something else.

Spend some time considering what you should give up on. Look at the things in your life that you really want. If you make a Life List or a Dream Board or whatever you call it, what is up there that you are working hard to achieve and it just isn’t happening? Is there one thing in particular that you have strived for and met with serious pushback or failure? Is there something that you are gaining no traction towards accomplishing, even though you have made some true and honest attempts. I could take 5 blog posts helping you figure out what items to give up on, and maybe one day I will, but for now I’ll give you the abbreviated version. Look for the following 5 categories: 1)Stressful. 2)Impossible. 3)Improbable. 4)Infinite. 5)Unimportant.

This exercise takes a lot of honesty and deep diving into your heart and soul. That’s why it is called inner-work (if you’re not familiar, read this book by an amazing couple). What I’ve noticed is that when we meet with adversity, we tend to focus on fixing the outside issues, like a new job or a new lover, but we avoid fixing the inner issues. It’s kind of like when you have a cold. Do you take medicine to fix the symptoms, or do you focus on fighting the germ? Often, we spend all of our energy on the symptoms and little attention goes to the cause.

  1. STRESSFUL: Is there something out there that you have been trying for maybe even years to do and it just isn’t happening?

This is where my situation came from. I had been trying, hoping, praying, working, for one particular thing in our family for 5 or 6 years and it happened! But then it was ripped away. I’ve gone through the why’s and who’s and such and it’s exhausting! One day I woke up and said “I give up”! What I was beginning to notice is that one desire that I had in my heart was not shared by my husband or any other member of my family, or likely even my friend group. And it didn’t really align with all of my other goals. I was truly alone in this desire and that had created so much stress in my life that it was doing more harm than good. It was as if God gave me a glance at the life I would have if he granted that prayer so I could understand how it wasn’t going to be what I had hoped it would be. The stress that it had already created in my life from trying and suffering alone was enough. Giving up on this one thing would do me way more good than ever achieving it. Most of us are not alone in our life, so when we are working towards a particular goal, if those that we do life with are working towards a different one, it becomes like tectonic plates. The friction in our relationships may be building. There may be a collision or a separation that can be catastrophic from just that one issue. That additional stress doesn’t disappear with the satisfaction you will get if you achieve that goal. It would be better in the long run to just GIVE UP!

  2. IMPOSSIBLE: Is there something on your Life List that will require a complete restructure of elements that you truly enjoy?

I believe there are people out there that can achieve their goals with hard work. I am firm believer in hard work. I almost think that is about the only thing I do well! And maybe natural talent isn’t as important for some as it is for others. But if you have zero access to the talent required to achieve your goal or the hard work required doesn’t allow for you to achieve other goals, then call it out for what it is and move on! Here’s an example…I wanted to be a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader my whole chidlhood. I even had the jacket. And though I was a talented dancer and performer, there was no way I was moving to Dallas. I cheered for the Charlotte Rage for a year, tried out for the Honeybees, and decided I had other, more important goals to accomplish.

  3. IMPROBABLE: Is there a goal you set that, based on who you are at your core, just isn’t going to happen?

Again, you have to understand who you are to see which goals are going to work. If you are a giver and your goal requires you to be selfish or take, you will spend time spinning your wheels to get to the realization you cannot achieve that goal. Who you are at your core is what all of your goals should be filtered through. There is an exercise in Start with Why by Simon Sinek that I call 7 Layers. I coach it to all of the agents that come to our firm. You begin by writing down the answer to Why? Why do you do that thing? Why do you want that goal? Then you read that answer and ask yourself, But Why? You do that 7 times. By the end you can get to the core of a true why. If your Life List is full of things that do not go along with who you truly are on the inside, then you should GIVE UP on them and start over!

  4. INFINITE: Do any of your goals, based on your current location, look like they are further than 10 years down the road?

Let’s talk definitions for a minute. A Life List is a list of things that you want to achieve in your life time. The items on there may take you 30 years to accomplish. That’s fine! But your Goals should not. We use the term BHAG (Big Hairy Audacious Goal). Your BHAG can be something truly wild that would be amazing if you accomplished that in 1, 5, or 10 years. When your goal is too far out, it is very difficult to create measurable steps to get to those goals. Let’s say your goal is to have 5 rental properties in 5 years. That is easy to walk backwards. One property per year means you need to save X amount in year one, make X amount of profit in year 2, etc. We can measure how we get there. If there is a goal in your mind or on your plan that is not measurable or doable in 10 years, rethink the way you are planning to get there. GIVE UP on the current plan and chart a new one with measurable, systematic, achievable steps.

  5. UNIMPORTANT: Does anything you’ve been telling yourself that you want to do just not jive with your personality or the rest of your goals?

Here we are, back at this idea of having to truly know yourself to be able to plot a course to achieve goals. If you do not know what drives your or creates happiness in your life or what motivates you from the inside out, then you cannot create goals that are achievable. If you have a goal written down that doesn’t flow from your inner self and true personality you are never going to achieve it. You can spend years trying, but it will not come easy if it ever even comes. Think of having a goal to be a veterinarian, but hating animals. I have met attorneys and doctors that don’t like people, but they don’t ever seem happy or truly fulfilled in their life. When something is important to you, you will carve out time and a path. “Where our focus goes, results follow.” It is so much easier to focus on the things that are important to us at our core. If the goal you are working towards is not worth it, just GIVE UP!

There is a stigma, especially in this self-help world, that giving up is bad. You need to push through, work harder, struggle, be tough. But there comes a point in your life where that struggle is no longer serving you physically, emotionally, or consciously. You are doing everything humanly possible to get there, and this is the key, but it just isn’t getting any closer to being realized. I say this is the key, because you cannot make that decision until you truly acknowledge if you are doing everything within your personal power.

Pick a topic. What have you done this week to get to that goal? What could you have done? What is stopping you?

It isn’t about blaming it on other people. Your goals in life can’t be based on what other people do. I have learned this one the hard way this year. Not even your significant other or family or partner. If you have a goal for yourself that depends on someone else having that same goal or taking some kind of action, you better have had a long, honest, constant conversation with them about how dedicated they are to their side of that goal before you go putting your precious time and energy into striving for it. We cannot control what another human does. No matter who they are. If their goals change and we don’t know it, we will waste or precious resources striving for a goal that is unattainable. And that type of goal is one worth giving up on!

Advice from a Former Teacher

I spent 10+ years in a public school High School English classroom. This time of year is wildly nostalgic for me, because I truly enjoyed being a teacher, though I didn’t enjoy a lot of the things that went along with it. I thought I might give you some idea of best practices to keep in mind as all the people go back to school, whether you have little ones or not. You see, in America we have compensatory national education. It’s amazing! Kids have to go to school. So this time of year is really a transition for the entire community, not just those with kiddos. 

Parents: Be kind. Be patient. You children have spent a few months in coast mode. Turning the learning back on doesn’t happen over night. Give them grace. Make it a big deal. Throw a party. Celebrate the day/week. Take them somewhere special. Make their favorite snack or dinner. Show up for everything. YES! Every single open house and parent-teacher event! IF you care, they will too. NO MATTER WHAT AGE! High Schools (even colleges) have those events too! Check in on homework. Ask about their favorite class. Ask about friends. Show interest.

Teachers: Take care of you. Allow time to decompress. Workout after school. Go to bed early. Read something not educational. Show the kiddos love AFTER you show them a little strength. Show the parents understanding. Prepare but don’t control. Roll with the punches and remember what is truly important (not math)!

Administrators: Have the teacher’s backs. Smile at the kids. Say hello to everyone. Introduce yourself. Get out of your office at class changes and lunches. Show up even if it’s not your duty. 

Coaches: Be tough but kind. Set expectations early. Coach the whole kid, not just the athlete.

Grandparents: Ask how their day was. Call. Text. Send a note. Don’t forget to check on the parents. 

Bros/Sis: Check in on anyone that went back to school. Wish them luck. Offer them help. Listen. Observe. 

Bosses: Be kind. This month is full of firsts that may be emotional or just plain hard. Understand that life is about so much more than the job. Help wherever you can. 

Clergy: Pray for all of them! This is a giant team effort and the fate of our world literally depends on its success. 

I know there are people without children that don’t think this applies to them, but it really does. This is likely the hardest week of the year for many families. Whether your support is tangible or emotional, just keep in mind what is going on in the lives of so many people during these next few weeks. Do you have any stories to share about your first days of school (past or present)? I would love to feature them on my social media!! Either connect with me on FaceBook or Insta or email them to me at mary.page@givingtreerealty.com!

Drop Back and Punt

WELCOME to the 2nd half!

Yep, we are half way through the year. Do you remember all those plans and goals that you had for 2023? How’s it going?? I think this is a great time to re-evaluate where you are, what your doing, and where you want the year to end up. I’ve put together a little plan for myself to evaluate just that and decided to share it here, along with some of my own answers.

Step 1: REVIEW

If you are like me the last 6 months have been pretty hectic. I think everyone’s life is hectic. I don’t care if you have a farm full of animals and a house full of people like me or not. Your life is likely just as busy. Maybe you put all of your time and energy into your work. Or maybe your extended family takes up all of your time. Either way, you have many things pulling you in different directions and the 3 goals you made for your 4 Categories 6 or 7 months ago are probably really hard to remember! That is why we wrote them down! So go back to your Life Planner, Daily Journal, whatever it is called, and look them up. What were you hoping to accomplish this year?

When I review my goals I am actually surprised. I thought I was way off on everything because the year has NOT gone for me as I expected. But in actuality, it’s really just one category that is way off track. The other 3 categories have been fairly successful for a mid-year check. Take some time to read back through what you wrote down and committed to as a goal for this year. You should have written a reason or importance to the goal. Review that too! Is that still true today, half way through the year?

Step 2: REFLECT

This is the point in the process that you have to dig in a little deep to find out why. Sometimes it’s not easy to answer. Sometimes the honest answer is an inside force and sometimes it is an outside force. The big thing is to be HONEST. Try NOT to blame only outside forces. Be sure to identify the things that you have the power to change. I think during COVID, we all learned the difference between the things we had the power to control and the things we did not. I couldn’t control the shut-downs and school closings, but I could control what I personally did every day.

In my Career goal, I am no where close to the number of closing and home sales that I want for this year. I’m only on track for about a third of that goal. Yes, a large portion of that could be attributed to the market slow downs, inflation and interest rates. All of those things are true! But what, in all honesty, could I have done differently to increase my business and work flow? If I am completely honest with myself I did not make the new connections in the community I wanted. I did not stay on top of social media posts and marketing plans like I had intended. If I’m completely honest, I didn’t even really make solid plans to get me there. So now I know there is plenty of work to do the rest of the year!

Step 3: ADJUST

Logistically, do you want to adjust the actual business plan? I think this is a great idea! Let’s make some edits and changes to the plan. Maybe the goal doesn’t change, but the steps to get to that goal do. Or the mode that we use to acheive that goal changes. Take a look at the goals you have set for the year. Do they still align with you? Is there an adjustment that needs to be made based on the last 6 months?

Just like at the begining of the year, you have got to write them down! You have got to communicate them to the universe (and maybe your significant other). You have to make it known that this is what you want to do so someone can help hold you accountable or celebrate your success or send potential help your way. Without the communication part of setting goals you are doing all of this on your own, and that is just not really possible. I am surrounded by an army of strong women, and that is why we are an army, because we need each other to make things happen.

Step 4: DESIGN

Take a look at the goals you have for the rest of the year and work backwards in your head to design a plan that will get you and keep you on the right path to achieve those goals! Here’s an example.

GOAL: I want to close 2 deals a month. (How many contracts do I need to write?)

Write 4 contracts per month. (How many meetings do I need to schedule?)

Schedule 2 live meetings per week. (How many phone calls do I need to make?)

Connect with 2 people (clients/prospects) per day.


The point is that sometimes we have to take a step back and see where we have made progress and where we haven’t. We have to be honest about our expectations as well as our limitations. Self-reflection is the key to improving, no matter what is being improved. Looking at what obstacles we faced this first half of the year is important to growing and learning and improving. Placing blame will get us nowhere but in the failure circle (I failed – I feel horrible – I don’t want to do it anymore – etc).

I want to share some of the tools with you that help me plan my business.

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Thank you for your response. ✨

Barn Cats

Have you ever met a barn cat? They can be a little ellusive. Usually they are wounded or scarred, stay away from human touch, and hide in plain sight. We inherited a barn cat named Mr. Bojangles when we bought this farm. When I first moved here as a renter, he welcomed me with loud cries for food and scary hiding spots in the rafters of my car port. But he was nothing like most barn cats I had known. Unfortunately, he is missing. We are worried and confused but still a little hopeful because he is such a special barn cat.

We always had barn cats on the farm I grew up on with my grandparents. They lived in the basement at night and roamed the farm in the day. I do remember one story of a particular cat who climed into the engine of my grandfathers old Dodge and wasn’t found until after he started the car to go to work that night. I don’t remember any of their names, though I know they had names. And I don’t remember ever snuggling or playing with them.

That is what made Bojangles, or Bo, so different. He was the best fire side cuddler on the farm. If it was cold and you had a fire going, he would curl up in your lap for a little snooze. Most evenings, fire or not, he would come to the house for some loving and an extra scoop of dry cat food, though he had just gotten a can of wet food in the tack room for supper. He loved to be picked up and cuddled like a baby, but only by me and my hubby. At our new farm house, he would sit at the back sliding glass door most nights taunting the inside cat into a game of show and tell. She would show him her toys and he would pretend he didn’t care. When we were new to his farm he had what we called a broken purr. It was rough and incomplete. We always said it was because he didn’t get enough practice. Over the years it fixed itself, or we fixed it, with all the loving he got. He greeted newcomers, human and animal, with caution at first, but quickly taught you how to respect his wishes.

I have always said he will be the subject of a childrens book one day. When the lady built this barn she adopted him and brought him here as a barn cat, but he soon won her heart and she decided to take him to her house for him to live as a house cat. One day, he got out and they couldn’t find him. A few weeks later he turned up back at the barn. This was his home. He chose it. Which is why it feels so empty now that he’s gone. It’s been 2 weeks now and there have been no signs of him. But I haven’t completely given up hope.

He’s been gone for a day or two before, but this is unusual. He’s lived on this farm for 10 years or more and avoided every preditor known to man, and probably some we don’t see. I have watched him run from a fight straight up a tree. He’s tough, but most of all he is smart and fast. I don’t think any of that changed. I don’t see him loosing speed or timing, even if he’s gotten older. He still doesn’t trust people or animals enough to get in trouble. We had a foster dog that didn’t know what to think of this big fluffy cat that came so close to him. The foster dog, Felix, was old and had spent a few years roaming the woods of a neighborhood when we picked him up. We were sure he had seen cats, but he didn’t know what to do with them. It was almost as if they had terrorized him and so he had to chase them away from his food. Bo just sat there and let Felix sniff him. He didn’t make a move or run or hiss. And Felix gently opened his mouth slowly around Bo’s neck. Bo was giving him the benefit of the doubt. But he quickly taught the old man to be a little more respectful.

If he’s lost, I know he can take care of himself. Sure, we feed him. We actually feed him a lot because he always looks so skinny. It’s a true testament to what an active lifestyle can do. But he’s resourceful enough to feed himself. And he absolutely LOVED to show you. He presented us with twin chipmunks laid perfectly side-by-side in a horse stall, birds of all sizes on the door mat, baby bunnies one after another when praised for a being a good boy, and more mice than you can count which he would swallow whole while our dog watched with great envy. If he’s been captured by someone else trying to turn him into a couch potato, he might get out again and come back. Or he might choose the indoor lifestyle for a bit!

At the end of the day, he’s a barn cat. We should envy their freedom. He can do whatever he wants, go wherever he wants, and be whatever he wants. There are people that love him and respect his independence right here on this farm. With that respect comes the unknown, a little bit of sorrow, and maybe some fear. Barn cats come and go sometimes without the help or permission of humans. I guess that’s what makes them so special.

Planning and the Planner

I am a serious planner! I business plan starting in October for the next year. I have researched, taken classes, conferenced and coached business planning for 5 years now. Here is how I break it down.

Life List…Reflection…Revision…Last Year…This Year…Each Month

It’s a method called “design down” that I took from my teacher days. Start with your end goal and work backwards. What will it take to get to that place on a yearly, quarterly, monthly, weekly, daily basis?

A few weeks ago a friend whose new business has met with a few struggles lately asked for my help in marketing ideas. She texted me one day and asked what kind of planner I used. I told her, “I’m so picky I have to make my own!” After I said it I realized how weird that sounds. But it’s true. There is one planner out that does all the things I need for my business, but it’s bulky and boring (the Ninja Planner)! I wanted something pretty, functional and minimalist. When I can’t find what I want, which is most of the time, I make it! I have been doing that my entire life. I used to even make my own prom dresses because I couldn’t find exactly what I wanted. Now I do it with farm, house, and business stuff. It definitely is how I grow my business. I don’t pay a service to market for me (I’m sure you’ve noticed – hahaha). I DIY just about everything around me, including the plans and planners I use. I thought I’d share some of it here! If you like it, I can share it with you too.

I start by creating a “Life List” of things I want to do with a perfect life! Then I make 3 or 4 goals for each section of my life, Career, Family, Relationships, and Self, that will help me get there or get closer to a piece of my perfect life. Then, a separate page for every Goal inside every Category allows me to design down…what steps will it take me to get to the goal? Setting a Target Date helps me align my 2023 planner to achieve those goals. I can put each Action Item on the Monthly Goals in my Planner. At the beginning of each Month I break those goals into steps for the weeks of that month. It may take one week or it may take all month. For Example…if I want to sell 24 houses this year, what do I need to do every month, week, day to achieve that goal? When can I schedule time in my day to do those things?

But what’s the point!? In real estate especially, do you have to plan your month or day or social media or marketing?

In the years that I have been training other agents, I have heard every excuse in the world. My favorite is, “even if I plan it something comes along and changes my plans.” Well, no shit! Life happens! But flying by the seat of your pants doesn’t effeciantly affect change. I will admit, talent and maybe even luck, will get you places. In real estate, your personality and past life or career will likely get you great places. But it won’t get you ALL of the places. And it won’t get you any of those places with consistency.

The Real Estate industry is in a weird place. I have divided agents into 2 categories…Before and During COVID. If you were licensed DC (During COVID), your definition of “business” is very different. Things just fell in your lap! You could literally do minimal work and get maximum profit. You were able to sell a house by working very little. Maybe you built a business with little to no effort at all. And there were so many people looking to sell, clients were easy to find. Being licensed BC (Before COVID), I know that agents have to work hard to get, keep, and help your clients. I can’t tell you how frustrating it is to talk to a friend or acquaintance that bought or sold a home recently without asking for my help! I think it happens once a week, maybe even every day.

My biggest suggestion to agents is to treat this like a business (because it is)! If you were the CEO of a large company, there would be procedure manuals and schedules to follow. You would have marketing plans and calendars and promotions. You would schedule trainings and conferences and meetings. There should be all those things in your own business. Here are my most important tips for Sole Proprietors and Entrepreneurs:

  • Make yourself a marketing schedule.
  • Make yourself a social media posting schedule.
  • Plan time to plan.
  • Create a Daily Routine
  • Time Block

I made a schedule that I share with agents in my firm to use for working ON your business because working IN your business is the easy part. It’s called The 15 Hour Work Week (which I’m happy to share). It’s a way to block time in the week for the pieces of growing your business that are most important. And when life and your schedule blow up, you know that things were missed that need to be taken care of later. But writing it down is super important!

Whatever force you believe in, when you speak things into the universe they have a much better chance of happening! I’m not sure if its the speaking or the being heard that makes it so, but it is true. I’m not big on telling other people what my goals and dreams are, but I do write it down. I believe wholeheartedly in vision boards and daily affirmations. Any one else?? One of my favorite quotes is “Stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself!”

Stop listening to yourself and start talking to yourself!

I don’t care what kind of goals you are trying to achieve this year…it’s going to take a plan and a planner!

In the last few years, I have been a bit more minimalist about my planner, but I do have very specific needs. I used to buy big 8.5X11 size planners when I was a teacher. Now I prefer half-page size ones that I can carry in a large purse or stylish bag instead of a bulky backpack. I need a month, week, and day planner. All three need a place for goals, focus, and tasks. The daily portion needs a time schedule so I can block hours or half hours. The Design Down concept from earlier works the same for every month…what are the monthly goals and how can I break those down each week and every day? I wasn’t able to find something that really met my needs this year, so I made my own.

Here’s my WEEK

And my DAY (obviously for the winter months)

Do you like any of these? I’m happy to share! Digital or Print versions. And if there’s a particular theme you’d prefer, let me know!

The only way that I can get so many things accomplished in my life is by being hyper-focused on one task at a time. I am a mother, run a horse farm, raise chickens and children, run a business, care for my family, and volunteer with a non-profit. It’s a lot to keep up with! We had an instance this week, because of exam schedules, where my calendar didn’t match my teenager’s schedule. She swears she told me she had an exam on that day, but it was definitely not on my calendar, so she couldn’t have because I would have written it down. Luckily, my husband had the day off and could take her to school, but she missed a practice exam that counted as a grade. I may be good at planning and organizing, but I am still not great at mind reading! If I ever figure that one out, I’ll let you know!

New People and Services

Well, we knew this day was coming and it finally did! Mom RETIRED! She is 75 (ish) and has worked since she was 14…for the record, so have I. It‘s just how this family is built. This was a GIANT step for her! Our emotions are all over the place, excited, scared, nervous, proud. But she’s not really retiring. She’s coming to work for me! So this post is not about her, so much as it is about me, hiring my first employee, creating work for her, paying my first set of taxes, and figuring out how all of that works!

The whole Fam on Vacay last Thanksgiving.

I went into real estate to help myself, originally, more so than to help other people. I wanted to build a career around selling homes for others but mostly buying them for myself to create passive income. Along the way, I realized that I have a service heart. I really love helping people achieve their goals, whatever they are! I enjoy sharing the benefits of homeownership with people similar to my story who didn’t come from a family with financial literacy. What I found is that sometimes that goal is just to have an independent place to live. I have certainly been there too. Some clients need help taking care of themselves and their families now to build the skills to get to home ownership a year or two or five down the road.

Enter my Momma! She wanted to retire, but was worried about money, because she has no retirement or wealth (other than her home…you can see what I mean about not learning these things from an early age). I have been really busy the last 2 years helping clients and want to focus time on the parts of the business that I enjoy, like writing this blog. I would also like to expand in a few other ways, like coaching new agents and entrepreneurs, growing a Lake Norman office, and building my own portfolio. So I asked Mom to come work for me to free me up to do more!

There are many reasons why that simple invitation is a miracle. Our relationship, probably like many parent/child relationships, was strained in past years. Life is not always rosy in that garden. But in my 40’s came great wisdom! She did the best she knew how. The same way I do the best I know how with my girls. It is not perfect, but it is my best. Most importantly, it is not for anyone to judge! Myself included! I realized a few years ago that if I didn’t find it fair that I judge other Mommy’s or let their judgement of me feel painful, I couldn’t judge my mother either. There is a book called Mother Hunger that the Red Table Talk has been focusing on for a while and I was really interested because I am a mother and my relationship with my mother didn’t seem strong. What I decided is that identifying that is all well and good, but the value is using it to grow into a better me.

As a Real Estate Assistant, she can take a lot of things off my plate, freeing me up to really spend time on the things I enjoy and that make me the most money. But maybe even more importantly, she can help renters so that they can become buyers. This means we can help renters find homes by learning the tricks and streamlining the process for them. Her and I both see a real need for help with this process. She has worked with people in her previous job that struggled finding suitable housing so she is well aware of the lack of affordable housing in Charlotte.

We are also going to extend our services to include rental property management. Again a service that I otherwise would not have time to staff or manage. I’m most excited about this service because this is my end goal long term. I want to own rental properties and manage them ourselves so we have passive income. It is such a great way to grow wealth! That will also include vacation rental property management. Again, a service I intend to do for my own rentals, so the ability to do it for others is a bonus. There are actually tons of vacation (or short term) rentals in and around Charlotte. And there are plenty of regulations, issues, and things that can be outsourced to a management team like us.

As with any growth there are always growing pains! It has been a struggle to figure out her pay structure. Since she is retirement age, she gets her full Social Security, which is under $20K (who could live off of just that?!). If she makes more than $52K per year in combined income, the federal government (and probably the state) will go back and tax that $20K so she would have to pay taxes, which she had to do last year. We decided it’s just safer to make just under that threshold and avoid taxing the SS income. We’ll see if that philosophy changes as we grow and move forward. Researching all the regulations for that, salary, and taxes has been difficult and I’m not sure I have all the answers, but I have a plan! Of course, I could hire a pay roll company. There are plenty out there! But I like doing things myself. Lets hope thats not a huge mistake!

Our biggest challenge has been training and job description. It has taken me 4 years to get to where I am in the business, so teaching someone else how to do what I do is pretty difficult. But I am a teacher at heart! I sat down last weekend and created an Assistant Manual for her. It’s a giant 2″ binder with everything she needs to work this job in writing. It comes complete with a monthly and daily suggested schedule. I dedicated a page for each computer system that I use with log in information, what it’s used for, and what her responsibility for it would be. I sprinkled in a little life philosophy like dream casting, life lists, and volunteer work. And then I wrote out as many tasks as I could think of that she might complete. I remember working jobs in my life where I had no idea what I was responsible for because there was no job description. You can’t hold people (even children, BTW) responsible for something if you never told them what that is.

We made it through her first week! And she has already reminded me to return emails I would have lost and gotten marketing postcards completed in record time. I am so excited for what we will do together! I am so excited for the additional number and types of clients we can really help! But most of all, I am proud that I can take care of my momma like I always said I would. I am also very nervous about that one, if I’m being honest.