It’s a New Market with New Rules

September 14, 2024September 14, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

Have you heard all the hoopla around the NAR lawsuits?? It created new rules and laws in real estate that the consumer needs to know. Here’s a breakdown of how the new rules have a direct effect on buyers and sellers in the current real estate market.

Buyers are required to be under a Buyer Agency Agreement prior to viewing a home. There are many ways that a good agent can guide you through this. Gone are the days of just opening a door as a favor to peak inside. Many buyers in the past don’t want to be locked into a contract with an agent that early in the process. Buyers will not be able to view homes without some type of contract. In many opinions, this type of rule prohibits listing agents from showing the home to potential buyers, except for during open houses. There must be a contract between a potential buyer and an agent prior to requesting a showing.
Sellers may negotiate realtor fees to pay a listing agent and offer a cooperating compensation if an agent bring a buyer. This rule is NOT new in NC. That has always been the law. It is new in many other states. Sellers have never been required to pay buyer agency compensation. Where we got into trouble was when some bad apples in the business would word this explanation a tiny bit inappropriately. By saying things like “the norm is” or “the average is”, these agents were misguiding their clients. There is not and has never been a “norm” when it comes to real estate fees.
The Buyer Agency Agreement in NC has always said…I will attempt to negotiate my fee (that we already agreed on) from the seller, but in the event that I can’t, the buyer is responsible to pay it at closing. That fee, like every other element of real estate, is negotiable. Real estate agents set their fees for service the same way a lawyer sets an hourly rate or a beautician sets their fees for services. I ask for 3% for existing homes and 4% for land and new construction (sometimes I wish I could charge an hourly rate). There are many ways to negotiate this into our offer. We can ask for seller paid concessions (sometimes known as closing costs). The buyer has to consider that in their offer since the seller is concerned about the net amount they will be paid. It may require increasing your offer to cover the concessions so the net amount is at listing. In that instance, you have to be very careful about appraisal value.
It is in the best interest of Sellers to continue offering Buyer Agency Cooperating Compensation especially for homes in the First Time Home Buyer price range. In many cases, those first time home buyers are stretched pretty thin with downpayment, closing costs, and inspection fees. Paying an agent is going to be tough. Many analysts are concerned that this is going to force people to try to do real estate transactions without the services of a licensed and trained agent. I always compare that to going to court without an attorney. You certainly can represent yourself, but you really shouldn’t! If FTHB begin buying real estate without an agent to help them, there are going to be a whole new set of lawsuits and problems and sellers could suffer.
Agents are no longer allowed to post to MLS the cooperating compensation offered. It now becomes an extra step of the Buyer Agent to find out that information. Some agents are planning to do this prior to showing, so the buyer can be aware early on if this particular home is one that fits into their budget. The problem is that listing agents are really hard to get on the phone sometimes, before this was ever the process. Now that every showing is going to call asking about Buyer agent compensation, they’ll never return calls! It is a step that will have to be done early so the buyer can make an informed decision about making an offer on the property and what that offer might look like with all factors on the table.

I have heard clatter that this will bring down the price of real estate. It will not! Real Estate prices are based on market sales, not realtor fees. As I mentioned earlier, it may even raise the price of the home because some buyers are going to roll it into their offer. I have even heard of some buyers suggesting that they can roll it into their loan amount. Who in the heck needs to pay 30 years of interest on real estate fees! I mean you are already paying j30 years of interest on the $10,000+ in loan fees the lender is charging you and burying in your closing. That is not a financial strategy that I would recommend, but I understand where it is coming from. We have simply shifted the burden from the seller reducing their profit to pay real estate fees, to the buyer increasing their payment to pay real estate fees (which is where the sellers money came from in the first place). This change to the market is no small hill to climb. It has already driven about 30,000 real estate agents out of the business. But not me! I have learned and trained and am training other agents on how to handle this for all of our clients! Maybe I just like a good challenge!

Barn Cats V2

June 2, 2024June 1, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

About a year and a half ago, I wrote about our barn cat BoJangles who was missing. I lamented about the heart wrenching job it is to own barn cats with all the dangers and troubles on the farm. We worried about him all the time! He got into tons of scuffles and close calls. He fought every cat that came close to the property, very loudly and usually in the middle of the night. But he would curl up in your lap by the fire pit and purr for hours. I am sad that Bo never returned to us like we wished. A barn cannot be without cats for too long or the mice will overrun it and then the snakes show up. If you have never seen how a horse reacts to a snake in or around their stall, consider yourself protected. So we had to rescue 2 little kittens from under my mother’s HVAC unit in downtown Charlotte and bring them out to the farm.

This was a trick! February of 2023 my mother sends me this picture of tiny kittens under her HVAC unit and we go on and on about what to do with them. We call animal control and they can’t take them because they are full. I don’t think she even got an answer from them for like 2 weeks. We decide to leave them alone and monitor until they were big enough to be away from their mother. Momma Kitty moves them to the neighbors house, probably because my mother has one of the most obnoxious little dogs you could ever imagine. And I am on the farm just hoping and wishing BoJangles comes home.

Finally, in April, I decide that we are going to need a barn cat for the upcoming summer and I cannot keep holding out hope for Bo. He would have been home already if he could. He would never willingly leave his barn. Mom talks to her neighbor, who by this point has been feeding them tuna cans and says he can’t keep up with all of them. I agree to catch 2 and bring them to the barn and the neighbor will keep 2 while mom and dad are also still around. Have you ever tried to catch a feral kitten?? Pro tip…do it much more before they are 3 months old! It took us over an hour, moving a bunch of junk in the neighbors backyard, and one seriously determined teenager of mine with gloves and blankets, but we finally got them. Boy were they angry! I wish I had taken a video of that crazy teenager crawling around through junk to catch them!

Once we got them to the barn, I realize I have no idea what I’m doing! I have only had like 3 cats in my whole life and they were indoor only. You know, liter box and a pile of food and you may not see them for 4 days. These kittens were out in the wild, far away from their siblings, and there are dangerous things on our farm. I had to come up with a plan! I took it step by step. And everyone told me I was wrong! We started with them in a dog kennel in the tack room of the barn with a litter box and food. Once they got too big (and WAY too messy) I had to seal up the cat door on the tack room and let them out in the room. They hid all the time, sometimes so well I had to search for a while to find them. As they got a little older, and it turned colder in the winter, I would close the big barn doors and open the tack room door so they could play in the barn. They were super timid, but began to run around and play. They even started killing mice! I had a lovely present in the middle of the barn one morning.

As the weather warmed up and the kittens turned a year old, I knew I couldn’t keep them closed in the barn forever. And everyone still kept telling me I was wrong! That first day of opening the barn doors scared me to death! But I think it scared them even more! Pretty soon they were following me to the pasture as I took out and brought in horses. For a while, I closed the doors at night to keep them safe, but that had to end as the weather warmed. Mick and Chick now have full reign of the farm, but they don’t venture too far from the barn and the safety of each other and their tack room. They don’t cuddle by the fire like Bo, but they are my favorites. They watch the farm from the barn doors day and night, tell me long stories while I clean stalls, and keep all the rodents out of the barn. I can pet and snuggle Chick when she’s looking for food. Every now and then I get a little nose pet in on Mick. But they are still crazy and feral as can be.

I am impressed with myself how I figured this out. They are totally dedicated to that tack room in the barn being their home. Yes, there are scary things out here that could hurt, but they have a safe place to run to for protection. BoJangles used to come to our back door and play with the indoor cat through the sliding glass door. Mick and Chick barely come down the driveway most of the time. But maybe that will change with time. They are their own little adorable personalities. And this farm is theirs to manage. Bojangles left them a home and a role to step right into.

Mr. BoJangles

I learned a few lessons this past year from this experience. One, everything happens for a reason. Two, the way I do it may not be the same as the way others would do it, but this is my show not theirs. And three, the 3day/3 week/3 month rule we always talk about in animal rescue does not apply to feral cats!

Building Things

May 18, 2024May 17, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

I absolutely love building things! What I have learned about myself in my last decade on Earth is that I truly enjoy figuring out how to do something myself. It brings me so much joy when I have an idea or plan and it works out! But what I’ve noticed the most is that my plan never works out exactly the way I plan it. There is always some variation that, inevitably, works out better. I have enjoyed learning the faith involved in that element of building. I have built a farm, a business, a family and a home. I have many plans to build many more things in my next decade. Building things takes a little knowledge, a bit of strategy, and a lot of faith.

My best example of building things, in real estate at least, is my current house. If you are not familiar, we built a new construction home on our existing farm. I had so many plans and ideas that didn’t work out! The biggest change that had to be made was in the location of the house. I wanted it placed in the woods on the other side of the creek. We built (and paid for) a culvert, an extra long drive way, and tons of gravel that gets absolutely no use today. But in the end, the house is perfect. We have a brand new home in a great location that gave us a ton of instant equity. I brought the knowledge of how to build the house using a contractor mainly from researching and working through a million different scenarios. We strategized the entire time, learning about land development, financing rules, and building issues. But the real magic came in the faith that it would turn out for the best. And it sure did!

A more recent example of building in real estate is the new construction project that my clients recently went under contract on. It is a gorgeous new house outside of Asheville. An independent builder bought this lot in a new neighborhood and designed and began construction on the home. We went under contract when it was at about 70% complete. This is a unique dynamic where the builder agent is NOT controlling the process of the build for my clients, the way a community home builder or track home builder would. In this case, a buyer agent, such as myself, has proved to be more important than ever! I am trying to help my clients understand what they can and cannot do, since the construction is nearly complete. We recently had an issue with granite. The buyers were able to pick granite, but they didn’t like the selections the builder gave them. As always, my philosophy of real estate is that there is always a solution, so that skill has proved invaluable in new construction!

Probably my most valuable thing that I built is this homestead! It may never be complete, either. But it is truly exactly what I wanted. My goal out here on the farm is to be a self sustaining as possible. I am no doomsday planner, but I grew up in a family that grew our own food and relied on family and friends to get things done. We have been able to create that out here, on a small scale, and I have tons of plans to continue that building…like solar panels on the barn, a deck and detached garage, and increasing the garden.

Building things is my biggest goal in life! I want to build more houses. But I also want to build family and business. I want to help other people build businesses. I want to build more houses for other people. I truly enjoy watching the process, even if I end up cussing the majority of the way through, like we did on our home! That’s the proof that I’m meant to build things. I have a small amount of knowledge and plan to really increase that, maybe even getting my own contractor license. I am great at creating a strategy in all the areas of building! And my faith in the process gets stronger and stronger every time I am proved wrong! I look forward to a long line of more things to build!

Love the House…Date the Rate

March 15, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

Have you heard this before??

In a market of high interest rates, this is one phrase that mortgage brokers are repeating everywhere. It sort of give’s me the heebie-jeebies. And I hadn’t really understood why until recently.

Mainly, by itself, this is just bad financial advice! It’s just like so many things…if you listen to it in a vaccuum or by itself, it isn’t a good move. So let me try to explain, from a non-financial person’s point of view.

The concept is that you can refinance your mortgage at any time. But there is so much more to consider when thinking of a refinance that, without an entire conversation, that advice becomes just a sales gimmick. And here’s why…

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The length of the loan. When you took out your mortgage, it is for a 30 year note. When you choose to refinance, it is for a 30 year note. The time does not get shorter! Lets say you bought in 2010 and refinanced in 2021 when rates were 3%. You jut added 11 years on to the amount of time that it will take you to pay off your home. If you were in your 40’s when you did the refi, you will now be in your 70’s when the home is paid off. For most of us that is past the time that we would like to retire, when we would like to work less and pay less bills. Even if you have ample retirement plans (and 75% of us don’t), for possibly 10 years of your retirement you are making a mortgage payment when it could have been paid off. People do this way too often. Instant gratification will not serve your needs in the long game. And LIFE is a long game. For many people this doesn’t seem like an issue because they will buy and sell every 10 or 11 years. But it really is! Unless you are paying more towards the principle of the loan, when you go to resell, the pay off amount has just been reconfigured for a much longer amount of time.

Lower Payments Are Deceiving. When you took out the original loan at $350K, the total you would have paid the bank in 30 years is $815K with principle and interest. The banks have to pay their people. They are not a non-profit. Even when you refinance, you are paying a huge amount over to the bank. In the example I used before, you are still paying the bank $474K (for a new 30 year term). You would have paid the bank $753K even with the refi. Do you think the same house will be worth that much more in 40 years? That depends! If the value of homes appreciates in that neighborhood at an average of 2% per year for 40 years, the homes value would be $772K. But if there’s a cooling period, or a financial crisis, or a fire, or a flood… It is a lot of variables to consider when thinking about getting your money’s worth on a refinance of your home. (And don’t even get me started on refinancing your car…do the same math and you will see the answer is NO!) This might sound confusing…I said I was not financial, not not smart. It helps me to write all the numbers down. Yes, like a high school algebra problem.

But there is a way to BEAT THE SYSTEM

Take a 15 year loan! If you are going to refinance and it has been at least 10 years since you first financed, ask about a 15 year mortgage! They even make a 20 and 25 now! Don’t just take the assumptive 30 year. Yes, the payments will be higher, but you will be paying significantly LESS in interest and more towards principle. It gives you more equity and the bank less money!

Buy Points on your Rate…maybe. Sometimes the lender will apply points without you asking to get your payment to where you can manage it with your debt-to-income ratio. It’s like paying a penalty to get your interest rate down. It doesn’t go toward anything else but a fee to the bank. It may be helpful, but it is not the best solution.

Pay More on Principle. This is always the best option. The more you can put down at the begining of a mortgage the less you pay mothly and in interest. Even in a refinance, that is a great time to pay more towards the principle.

The MOST important thing is that you love your home. I can tell you from experience that if you are in a place where the energy is off, the space isn’t working for your family, the neighborhood has you stiffled, or the commute is causing you too much anxiety (just to name a few reasons people move) than it is time to find a new home. You DO NOT have to wait for the perfect market conditions. There are tips and tricks out there

What is Equity and How do I Get It?

March 15, 2024March 16, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

I think this is a hard concept for people to understand. I have had to explain it a few times to new home owners. The good news is that I have seen a few examples lately of instant equity when people are purchasing homes, which is great news when buyers feel like the interest rates are high. And just like any other market anomaly, this too shall pass. So if you are considering buying, here’s an idea of how this will help you! I wanted to crunch some numbers and show how this benefits buyers in this market.

Let me give you a couple of stories of what I have seen in the market.

One recent buyer in the Mint Hill, NC area purchased a home for $374,900. The appraisal came back at $395,000!

Another buyer recently went under contract on a property for $239, 500 in the Derita area of Charlotte, NC. That appraisal came in at an $11,000 increase for instant equity.

This is happening because of exactly what buyers were hoping for…prices are coming down! There has been so little movement in the market during the past winter months that sellers are dropping prices left and right. You want a deal (as everyone seems to), buy in January or February. The prices of the homes are adjusting, but the appraisals have not caught up. Appraisers generally look at sales for the last 3-6 months. If little inventory is moving, the appraiser only sees the inflated prices that existed when the market was busy. I also look at those same numbers when helping sellers determine a list price, but I use market conditions to guide my clients. Busier market = higher list price. Appraisals do not include market conditions or fluctuations.

But what does that mean for my buyers? It’s like they walk into ownership of that property with money saved in the bank. It is not money that they can actually use. It’s a sort of credit. It increased the value of the home, but they are still paying the mortgage at the list price they agreed to. A homeowner can borrow against the equity in the home through a Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC) or Home Equity Loan. Obviously, it is a loan of some sort and monthly payments are required and there is a fee for borrowing in the interest rate, but it can help homeowners do repairs or make improvements.

For folks who have owned your home for 10 or more years (the average time that people choose to sell is 11 years) you probably have a considerable amount of money in equity in the home. I often advise clients to use that equity to improve their home before they sale. If possible, borrow against that equity to make necessary adjustment to the condition or style of the home to get the absolute highest market value out of your home. We can list it sometimes in a completely different market bracket. Obviously we will sit down and compare the cost of the renovation with the increase in the value of the house and how close those numbers may be before making that decision. If you have to pay $10K for the reno and you’re only going to increase the list price by $10K, like any other investment, it may not be worth the work and time for the renovation. At closing the HELOC will be paid by the attorney so, in some cases, you aren’t even making a payment or paying the interest.

I look at equity a lot like I look at net worth. It’s kinda like fake money. It’s not something that you have liquid in the bank. It requires a little bit of work to get the value out of something. You have to sell an asset to make it liquid. But I do think equity is a lot easier to use than other investments. I amy be a little bias, thought, since real estate is literally what I do!

I’m on a Mission

January 20, 2024 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

For the last five years, I have been on a mission to create a charitable legacy from my real estate business with Giving Tree Realty and catering to cats and dogs. I have learned so much!

Number one, rescue is effing hard! It is hard, no matter at what level you participate. The people that volunteer , and stay with our rescue are some of the toughest, kindest, most endearing humans I have ever had the pleasure to meet on this planet! A lot of people like to judge the volunteers, and especially the management of a nonprofit, but I see it a lot like I see parenting. You have no idea, what they do or what they go through! So in my opinion, the only thing I can do is offer whatever support they ask for. I often reach out to our Director and say “what can I do for you?” To which she always replies already do so much. But literally, these animals would not survive if the volunteers and donators at catering to cats and dogs we’re not super committed to the work that we do.

Number two, I’ve learned that people don’t know how to help. Everyone says “oh that’s such a cool concept”, when I explain to them how Giving Tree works, but they don’t know what to do to help. So here’s how it works… for every home that I sell Giving Tree donates 1.5% of gross commission to the rescue in my name. The more homes that I buy and sell the more money the rescue makes! Last year I donated about $1500. This year I’m on a mission to raise $5000! I’ve gotten really close to that number in years past, and I believe this year is going to be really busy in real estate. But what if you don’t want to buy or sell a house, but you still want to help the rescue? Referrals. Referrals. Referrals. I will donate $25 for every referral that you send my way! Click the link above to register –or– click the links below to our social media. But help doesn’t stop there! Spread the word! Like, share, comment, and interact with my social media. Follow the rescue. Follow Giving Tree Realty. Social media, for all its faults, has a way of connecting people with like-minded ideas!

Number three, I’ve learned that I truly wouldn’t do this business. Any other way! Real estate is one of those things that you can be super successful at. I have seen the success and the failure. But I completely believe that your true fulfillment comes from Giving. I can handle all of the stress and anxiety that this industry brings a little easier when I know that I am saving furry lives like the ones below WHILE helping clients navigate the ever-changing market.

For some reason that I don’t understand, agents leave our firm all the time. I think in their mind they believe that they will continue the charitable legacy that they begin and Giving Tree Realty on their own (or they don’t care about the charity and didn’t belong there in the first place). I have seen firsthand how they become just the “agent”. Successful? Probably! Especially if they took any of our training classes to get there. Maybe they make a donation here and there. But it’s not always about the donation. It’s about posts like this that get the mission out not only for Giving Tree Realty but also for Catering to Cats and Dogs. It’s about the partnership that’s created between the business world and the nonprofit world. It’s about the partnership that’s created with the people involved in both institutions. And for me, it’s about doing something more that I could ever imagine!

Happy new year to everyone! I am looking forward to a successful and prosperous 2024!

The Season of Giving Up

December 30, 2023December 29, 2023 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

Have you had a rough time? I don’t know if it’s just me. I don’t feel like it is. I’ve talked to a lot of people that are having an equally rough time. What I find is that every one has their own rough season, but we all have them. For some of us it lasts months, for some it lasts years, but all of us go through a period of time where the successes may be small or few and the defeats are giant or plentiful (we’ll get to the difference in a bit). Part of me would like to think this is like a COVID hang over. We tried to fix a national emergency by throwing money at it and now we are paying the price for that economically and socially. I think that even if the problems are not really economical in your life it has a trickle effect into the rest of our psyche that causes this time of utter frustration and disappointment. So I have chosen this as a time to regroup. And what better time than my favorite time of the year, Business Planning Season. This year I want to talk about a season of giving up!

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Let’s talk about the idea of giving up first. If you are not someone who has ever done this, maybe it will feel difficult at first, but I can guarantee it will be liberating. This is the act of simply walking away, changing direction, putting it out of your mind, setting it down, moving on, finding a different thing. Whatever it is you choose to give up on, there are no hard feelings, no regrets, and no disappointment. It is a conscious decisions based on some serious, deep inner-work. You make an educated decision to do something else.

Spend some time considering what you should give up on. Look at the things in your life that you really want. If you make a Life List or a Dream Board or whatever you call it, what is up there that you are working hard to achieve and it just isn’t happening? Is there one thing in particular that you have strived for and met with serious pushback or failure? Is there something that you are gaining no traction towards accomplishing, even though you have made some true and honest attempts. I could take 5 blog posts helping you figure out what items to give up on, and maybe one day I will, but for now I’ll give you the abbreviated version. Look for the following 5 categories: 1)Stressful. 2)Impossible. 3)Improbable. 4)Infinite. 5)Unimportant.

This exercise takes a lot of honesty and deep diving into your heart and soul. That’s why it is called inner-work (if you’re not familiar, read this book by an amazing couple). What I’ve noticed is that when we meet with adversity, we tend to focus on fixing the outside issues, like a new job or a new lover, but we avoid fixing the inner issues. It’s kind of like when you have a cold. Do you take medicine to fix the symptoms, or do you focus on fighting the germ? Often, we spend all of our energy on the symptoms and little attention goes to the cause.

STRESSFUL: Is there something out there that you have been trying for maybe even years to do and it just isn’t happening?

This is where my situation came from. I had been trying, hoping, praying, working, for one particular thing in our family for 5 or 6 years and it happened! But then it was ripped away. I’ve gone through the why’s and who’s and such and it’s exhausting! One day I woke up and said “I give up”! What I was beginning to notice is that one desire that I had in my heart was not shared by my husband or any other member of my family, or likely even my friend group. And it didn’t really align with all of my other goals. I was truly alone in this desire and that had created so much stress in my life that it was doing more harm than good. It was as if God gave me a glance at the life I would have if he granted that prayer so I could understand how it wasn’t going to be what I had hoped it would be. The stress that it had already created in my life from trying and suffering alone was enough. Giving up on this one thing would do me way more good than ever achieving it. Most of us are not alone in our life, so when we are working towards a particular goal, if those that we do life with are working towards a different one, it becomes like tectonic plates. The friction in our relationships may be building. There may be a collision or a separation that can be catastrophic from just that one issue. That additional stress doesn’t disappear with the satisfaction you will get if you achieve that goal. It would be better in the long run to just GIVE UP!

2. IMPOSSIBLE: Is there something on your Life List that will require a complete restructure of elements that you truly enjoy?

I believe there are people out there that can achieve their goals with hard work. I am firm believer in hard work. I almost think that is about the only thing I do well! And maybe natural talent isn’t as important for some as it is for others. But if you have zero access to the talent required to achieve your goal or the hard work required doesn’t allow for you to achieve other goals, then call it out for what it is and move on! Here’s an example…I wanted to be a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader my whole chidlhood. I even had the jacket. And though I was a talented dancer and performer, there was no way I was moving to Dallas. I cheered for the Charlotte Rage for a year, tried out for the Honeybees, and decided I had other, more important goals to accomplish.

3. IMPROBABLE: Is there a goal you set that, based on who you are at your core, just isn’t going to happen?

Again, you have to understand who you are to see which goals are going to work. If you are a giver and your goal requires you to be selfish or take, you will spend time spinning your wheels to get to the realization you cannot achieve that goal. Who you are at your core is what all of your goals should be filtered through. There is an exercise in Start with Why by Simon Sinek that I call 7 Layers. I coach it to all of the agents that come to our firm. You begin by writing down the answer to Why? Why do you do that thing? Why do you want that goal? Then you read that answer and ask yourself, But Why? You do that 7 times. By the end you can get to the core of a true why. If your Life List is full of things that do not go along with who you truly are on the inside, then you should GIVE UP on them and start over!

4. INFINITE: Do any of your goals, based on your current location, look like they are further than 10 years down the road?

Let’s talk definitions for a minute. A Life List is a list of things that you want to achieve in your life time. The items on there may take you 30 years to accomplish. That’s fine! But your Goals should not. We use the term BHAG (Big Hairy Audacious Goal). Your BHAG can be something truly wild that would be amazing if you accomplished that in 1, 5, or 10 years. When your goal is too far out, it is very difficult to create measurable steps to get to those goals. Let’s say your goal is to have 5 rental properties in 5 years. That is easy to walk backwards. One property per year means you need to save X amount in year one, make X amount of profit in year 2, etc. We can measure how we get there. If there is a goal in your mind or on your plan that is not measurable or doable in 10 years, rethink the way you are planning to get there. GIVE UP on the current plan and chart a new one with measurable, systematic, achievable steps.

5. UNIMPORTANT: Does anything you’ve been telling yourself that you want to do just not jive with your personality or the rest of your goals?

Here we are, back at this idea of having to truly know yourself to be able to plot a course to achieve goals. If you do not know what drives your or creates happiness in your life or what motivates you from the inside out, then you cannot create goals that are achievable. If you have a goal written down that doesn’t flow from your inner self and true personality you are never going to achieve it. You can spend years trying, but it will not come easy if it ever even comes. Think of having a goal to be a veterinarian, but hating animals. I have met attorneys and doctors that don’t like people, but they don’t ever seem happy or truly fulfilled in their life. When something is important to you, you will carve out time and a path. “Where our focus goes, results follow.” It is so much easier to focus on the things that are important to us at our core. If the goal you are working towards is not worth it, just GIVE UP!

There is a stigma, especially in this self-help world, that giving up is bad. You need to push through, work harder, struggle, be tough. But there comes a point in your life where that struggle is no longer serving you physically, emotionally, or consciously. You are doing everything humanly possible to get there, and this is the key, but it just isn’t getting any closer to being realized. I say this is the key, because you cannot make that decision until you truly acknowledge if you are doing everything within your personal power.

Pick a topic. What have you done this week to get to that goal? What could you have done? What is stopping you?

It isn’t about blaming it on other people. Your goals in life can’t be based on what other people do. I have learned this one the hard way this year. Not even your significant other or family or partner. If you have a goal for yourself that depends on someone else having that same goal or taking some kind of action, you better have had a long, honest, constant conversation with them about how dedicated they are to their side of that goal before you go putting your precious time and energy into striving for it. We cannot control what another human does. No matter who they are. If their goals change and we don’t know it, we will waste or precious resources striving for a goal that is unattainable. And that type of goal is one worth giving up on!

Advice from a Former Teacher

August 26, 2023August 26, 2023 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

I spent 10+ years in a public school High School English classroom. This time of year is wildly nostalgic for me, because I truly enjoyed being a teacher, though I didn’t enjoy a lot of the things that went along with it. I thought I might give you some idea of best practices to keep in mind as all the people go back to school, whether you have little ones or not. You see, in America we have compensatory national education. It’s amazing! Kids have to go to school. So this time of year is really a transition for the entire community, not just those with kiddos.

Parents: Be kind. Be patient. You children have spent a few months in coast mode. Turning the learning back on doesn’t happen over night. Give them grace. Make it a big deal. Throw a party. Celebrate the day/week. Take them somewhere special. Make their favorite snack or dinner. Show up for everything. YES! Every single open house and parent-teacher event! IF you care, they will too. NO MATTER WHAT AGE! High Schools (even colleges) have those events too! Check in on homework. Ask about their favorite class. Ask about friends. Show interest.

Teachers: Take care of you. Allow time to decompress. Workout after school. Go to bed early. Read something not educational. Show the kiddos love AFTER you show them a little strength. Show the parents understanding. Prepare but don’t control. Roll with the punches and remember what is truly important (not math)!

Administrators: Have the teacher’s backs. Smile at the kids. Say hello to everyone. Introduce yourself. Get out of your office at class changes and lunches. Show up even if it’s not your duty.

Coaches: Be tough but kind. Set expectations early. Coach the whole kid, not just the athlete.

Grandparents: Ask how their day was. Call. Text. Send a note. Don’t forget to check on the parents.

Bros/Sis: Check in on anyone that went back to school. Wish them luck. Offer them help. Listen. Observe.

Bosses: Be kind. This month is full of firsts that may be emotional or just plain hard. Understand that life is about so much more than the job. Help wherever you can.

Clergy: Pray for all of them! This is a giant team effort and the fate of our world literally depends on its success.

I know there are people without children that don’t think this applies to them, but it really does. This is likely the hardest week of the year for many families. Whether your support is tangible or emotional, just keep in mind what is going on in the lives of so many people during these next few weeks. Do you have any stories to share about your first days of school (past or present)? I would love to feature them on my social media!! Either connect with me on FaceBook or Insta or email them to me at mary.page@givingtreerealty.com!

Drop Back and Punt

July 16, 2023August 5, 2023 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

WELCOME to the 2nd half!

Yep, we are half way through the year. Do you remember all those plans and goals that you had for 2023? How’s it going?? I think this is a great time to re-evaluate where you are, what your doing, and where you want the year to end up. I’ve put together a little plan for myself to evaluate just that and decided to share it here, along with some of my own answers.

Step 1: REVIEW

If you are like me the last 6 months have been pretty hectic. I think everyone’s life is hectic. I don’t care if you have a farm full of animals and a house full of people like me or not. Your life is likely just as busy. Maybe you put all of your time and energy into your work. Or maybe your extended family takes up all of your time. Either way, you have many things pulling you in different directions and the 3 goals you made for your 4 Categories 6 or 7 months ago are probably really hard to remember! That is why we wrote them down! So go back to your Life Planner, Daily Journal, whatever it is called, and look them up. What were you hoping to accomplish this year?

When I review my goals I am actually surprised. I thought I was way off on everything because the year has NOT gone for me as I expected. But in actuality, it’s really just one category that is way off track. The other 3 categories have been fairly successful for a mid-year check. Take some time to read back through what you wrote down and committed to as a goal for this year. You should have written a reason or importance to the goal. Review that too! Is that still true today, half way through the year?

Step 2: REFLECT

This is the point in the process that you have to dig in a little deep to find out why. Sometimes it’s not easy to answer. Sometimes the honest answer is an inside force and sometimes it is an outside force. The big thing is to be HONEST. Try NOT to blame only outside forces. Be sure to identify the things that you have the power to change. I think during COVID, we all learned the difference between the things we had the power to control and the things we did not. I couldn’t control the shut-downs and school closings, but I could control what I personally did every day.

In my Career goal, I am no where close to the number of closing and home sales that I want for this year. I’m only on track for about a third of that goal. Yes, a large portion of that could be attributed to the market slow downs, inflation and interest rates. All of those things are true! But what, in all honesty, could I have done differently to increase my business and work flow? If I am completely honest with myself I did not make the new connections in the community I wanted. I did not stay on top of social media posts and marketing plans like I had intended. If I’m completely honest, I didn’t even really make solid plans to get me there. So now I know there is plenty of work to do the rest of the year!

Step 3: ADJUST

Logistically, do you want to adjust the actual business plan? I think this is a great idea! Let’s make some edits and changes to the plan. Maybe the goal doesn’t change, but the steps to get to that goal do. Or the mode that we use to acheive that goal changes. Take a look at the goals you have set for the year. Do they still align with you? Is there an adjustment that needs to be made based on the last 6 months?

Just like at the begining of the year, you have got to write them down! You have got to communicate them to the universe (and maybe your significant other). You have to make it known that this is what you want to do so someone can help hold you accountable or celebrate your success or send potential help your way. Without the communication part of setting goals you are doing all of this on your own, and that is just not really possible. I am surrounded by an army of strong women, and that is why we are an army, because we need each other to make things happen.

Step 4: DESIGN

Take a look at the goals you have for the rest of the year and work backwards in your head to design a plan that will get you and keep you on the right path to achieve those goals! Here’s an example.

GOAL: I want to close 2 deals a month. (How many contracts do I need to write?)

Write 4 contracts per month. (How many meetings do I need to schedule?)

Schedule 2 live meetings per week. (How many phone calls do I need to make?)

Connect with 2 people (clients/prospects) per day.

The point is that sometimes we have to take a step back and see where we have made progress and where we haven’t. We have to be honest about our expectations as well as our limitations. Self-reflection is the key to improving, no matter what is being improved. Looking at what obstacles we faced this first half of the year is important to growing and learning and improving. Placing blame will get us nowhere but in the failure circle (I failed – I feel horrible – I don’t want to do it anymore – etc).

I want to share some of the tools with you that help me plan my business.

mid-year-review-planner Download

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Thank you for your response. ✨

Pay for College with Real Estate

July 1, 2023 / southerngirlweb / Leave a comment

A year ago we were celebrating my oldest daughter’s graduation from high school, like many are this time of year. So after one year of supporting an adult, there is one thing I would like to revisit…529 accounts WILL NOT pay for college! There were so many things that went wrong…the college sent HER a CHECK when we moved the funds, she had to claim it as income, and it never even paid the tuition! I have talked about using real estate to pay for college before, but here’s a brief review:

Buy your newborn a house. (Or your 5YO or 10YO)
Rent the house out to pay the mortgage and expenses.
At the end of 18 years (or whatever), sell and use the profits to pay for college.

Even better, buy with a 15 year mortgage and let this happy new adult decide to continue renting and make a monthly, passive income or sell and have the lump sum of the sale since it will be owned free and clear and you have 18 years of appreciation. Talk to a financial person about where to put the money. And know that you will pay capital games taxes on the profit. But still! I can promise you a 529, savings, or anything else for that matter, won’t make an 8% return year over year. Yes, that right! Real Estate in Charlotte, North Carolina average an ROI of 8%. At $100,000, that’s $8,000 per year for 15 years. That’s a profit at $120,000, plenty to pay for university of their choice. There are other options, but not anything with that kind of return on investment.

Here’s another example:

Buy a house for $150K (yes, it’s possible)
Rent for $1300/month (putting 10% down)
In 15 years, sell for $350K. The Loan has been paid off and all $350K is profit. That’s like putting away $23K per year.

Again, all the numbers can be adjusted. And there are even more options for financing than there are real estate opportunities. But, yes, even with interest rates “as high as they are” (BTW, they are not…I bought my first house at 11%), you can invest in real estate and make money. The point is, in my opinion, real estate is the most sure investment you can make, especially if you live in the Charlotte area. And there are so many communities around the country that the figures will work out in your favor.